#72 An Emotional Day.

When Nathan wakes up tomorrow, he will be a big one-year-old.  This truth hit me like a bolt of lightning today, and I have been struggling to keep myself together since.

When I picked up Nathan from school today, the door to his classroom was decorated with a “Happy Birthday, Nathan!” sign and pictures of his sweet face.  I immediately began tearing up, and as I walked through the door, his sweet smile was the first thing I saw.  He nearly jumped out of his teacher’s arms to give me a hug, and then insisted that I give him a kiss on his little mouth.  He then began babbling and laughing, filling me in on his day.  To have such a personality at such a young age still continues to amaze me.

Then fast forward to tonight, when I was giving him and his brother a bath.  I began tearing up again watching the two of them; time keeps us moving forward, whether we are ready for it or not.  These two boys keep growing despite this mama’s refusal to admit it.  Nathan kept standing up in the bathtub to try and give me a hug.  It was like he knew his mama needed some extra snuggles.

This year has been an absolute whirlwind.  As much chaos as having two children can bring, bringing Nathan into this world has brought me more joy than I could have ever imagined.  This little person made our family whole.  I remember the guilt I felt when I first found out I was pregnant; on one hand, I was incredibly excited.  On the other, I was nervous about how bringing another baby into the family would change our family dynamic.  However, once he arrived, he and his brother had an immediate connection, and the guilt I felt melted away.  The love they have for each other is absolutely beautiful to see.  He is his brother’s best friend, and I am eager to see how their relationship grows over the years.  You were the missing puzzle piece in our family, Nathan.  I will forever be grateful for you.